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Some Times The News Is (Mostly) Good

Some Times The News Is (Mostly) Good published on

It seems that schools in England are to be given guidelines on what kiddies and teachers can and can’t say to one another. While I might usually condemn this kind of thing as Orwellian ( for example, when it’s some PC bullshit about gendered pronouns or forcing boys to wear pink tutus and hold tea parties for their stuffed animals) in this case I think it a good thing.

For something coming out of a modern education system, the guidelines seem pretty sensible, and unexpectedly pro-male. Amongst the banned crap will be…

Telling boys to “Man up”
Calling boys “sissies”
Calling children or each other “cupcake”
Boys telling girls to “make them a sandwich”
Teachers saying to boys “don’t be a girl”.
Calling girls who study ‘male’ subjects “lesbians”

In a world where praising females and pissing on males is de rigueur, it is refreshing to see a ban not only on telling girls they are dykes for liking math, but also on telling boys to “man up” because they aren’t being the cold, stoic lumps that the plutocrats would like them to be. Kids are incredibly malleable, and such an enforcement of gender stereotypes is bound to have a detrimental effect on them reaching some sort of emotional and intellectual maturity. Hell, this shit works even on men and women, can you imagine how much more powerful it is on the young and impressionable? So to this, I say, “Good! It’s about bloody time!”

Of course, social conservatives are bound to be outraged by this — note, for example, the quotation marks around the word sexist in the linked article’s title! But what else can be expected from people who have oatmeal for brains? Far as I can tell, nobody is going to force kids to do things they don’t want to — nobody is going to force Johnny to play with dolls and Janey to play with trucks, so I don’t see the big deal.

Not surprisingly, the whole thing is being touted as being primarily about the girls because females are always the primary victims of anything bad that happens. Prostate cancer, for example, is an area in which the primary victims are women because many end up with men who are either dead or impotent! This is how our sick, twisted society looks at everything, but we mustn’t let the gynocentric language surrounding the initiative blind us to the potential benefits this will have for boys.

I was especially pleased to see this bit…

“Clare Thomson, of the Institute of Physics, who helped to draw up the guidelines, told The Sunday Times: “Even low-level comments are potentially an issue with teachers using phrases such as ‘man up’.”

It’s good to see that not only are the kids being told to stop being such little shits, so are the teachers. As for the whole “man up” thing, it is as offensive and fucking retarded as it gets. What, a man is less of a man because he doesn’t do what you want him to? His balls drop off if he doesn’t follow your orders, do they? The phrase is pathetic even when used on a man, but on a boy? Why the fuck should he “man up” when he isn’t even a man!?!?! He’s a boy, a child, and he has the right to be so without some piece of shit trying to shame him into being something he is not.

The news isn’t all good, hence the title of this post, as some schools have decided to enforce these new guidelines by setting up squads of little feminazis to go around harassing kids who break the rules. How’s that for the modern definition of sexual equality? Only the girls get to police the new rules, and who do you think they will go after more eagerly – the boy jerks or the girl jerks? Can you imagine if this was about racism these schools appointing white-only groups to police it? These particular schools, wherever they are, are clearly being run by sexist, anti-male, white-knighting dweebs who should be fired so they can go do something that involves less power over the young. Cleaning toilets or jumping off cliffs are activities that come to mind, though I’m not sure anyone will pay them to do the latter.

Article here.

Rich White Woman Shot Dead By New York Police Officer

Rich White Woman Shot Dead By New York Police Officer published on

Ms Lilly Weiss, 34, of Manhattan, got lost on her way to the Hamptons and made the mistake of stopping off at a Harlem 7-11 to ask for directions. While there she also decided to buy, for undisclosed reasons, a sole cucumber. When she returned to the parking lot, Ms Weiss was promptly blown to kingdom come by Officer Lee Whey, who was deeply dismayed to find out the race, class, and sex of his victim.

Speaking through his legal representative, Officer Whey stated…

”I am deeply sorry for this tragic mistake. As Ms Weiss was sporting a dark tan and it was Harlem, I thought she was black. Furthermore, someone up the street had told me there was a homeless,black drag queen called Rastus hanging around and as you can see from the autopsy photos, Ms Weiss wasn’t the prettiest of women. This, combined with the fact that she was at the time wielding what appeared to be a loaded cucumber, led me to mistake Ms Weiss for a black man. Also, she had a really mean look on her face, which further convinced me of both her maleness and her blackness.”

When it was pointed out that, according to eyewitness accounts, Ms Weiss was smiling broadly when shot, the officer claimed “Er…I thought she was eating watermelon?”

While the matter is investigated by his brother officers, Officer Whey has been put on leave. He is believed to be spending it in the Riviera, in the company of several Playboy playmates.

Female Journalists Outraged At Being Denied Cheap Thrills

Female Journalists Outraged At Being Denied Cheap Thrills published on

A couple of Peeping Thomasinas have taken to Twitter to complain bitterly that they failed to cop an eyeful after a recent NFL game. The two lascivious creatures tried getting into the men’s locker room, only to be stopped by some old fuddy duddy who was, apparently, under the impression that not all males like to have their members stared at by members of the Superior Sex.

One of the women, the bizarrely named Graham Watson, screeched hysterically…

“I have covered male sporting events all over the world and it took coming to Indianapolis to face my first gender discrimination.”

I wonder what she would call male reporters being asked to wait while an usher checked with a women’s team if they were allowed to come in? Common sense, that’s what she would call it. But her female privilege stops her seeing it that way when it’s men whose privacy is being respected.

In typical Amerikan fashion, the NFL teams involved completely failed to stand up for their sex by actually apologizing to the perverted women for not allowing them to get their jollies! Here’s an unlikely headline – “WNBA Apologizes For Not Letting Men See Players With Their Pussies Hanging Out!”

Ms Watson later tweeted…

“I do want to note that we were eventually allowed through, but by the time we got inside there wasn’t a naked cock to be seen. Very disappointing! Now, if you will excuse me, I have to go Google for “naked jocks with big cocks.”

Feminist indignation at its finest here.

Kewpie Doll Steps Out Of Line, Gets Eaten Alive By Angry Birds

Kewpie Doll Steps Out Of Line, Gets Eaten Alive By Angry Birds published on

Ain’t it just grand when the feminists turn on one another over the most minor of things? Emma Watson, the disgusting little dwarf who gave that shameful “HeForShe” speech at the UN, has just made the mistake of saying that some of the best feminists are men! While I see that as yet another gross insult to the male sex, the pinheads and reprobates who litter Twitter saw it as some sort of attack on feminism. Or it had something to do with race. Or something.

Amongst the more coherent tweets are such pearls of wisdom as…

“Emma Watson is a problematic fav. I love her but she needs to educate herself and stop trying to get male approval with her white feminism.”

Puzzling, as in the piece there is no mention of race. My guess is that “white feminism” is just another nonsensical SJW term that has nothing to do with what is actually happening.

“WHY DOES EMMA WATSON ALWAYS MORE CONCERNED ABOUT MEN, SHE SPENDS ALL HER TIME CATERING TO MALE FEMINISTS”

Love the all-caps, madam. Combined with your atrocious mangling of the English language it truly makes you look like someone who should be taken seriously.

“Emma Watson’s views shouldn’t be considered feminism, anything that questions black women and seeks male approval is NOT feminism”

What? Which black women did she question? It’s almost as if Twitter feminists live in a completely different reality to the rest of us…

As for Watson herself, she claims to have “experienced” sexism because most of the directors she has worked with have been male. Yeah, and most of the nurses and school teachers I have encountered have been female, so I guess that I also have “experienced sexism.” What a schmuck.

There’s also some crap caption under the video in which it is claimed that she said “It was seven men and me”! That doesn’t seem to be in either the video or the print, but it makes you wonder what the hell young Emma is getting up to in her spare time. Emma Watson – actress, feminist twat, human bowling ball.

Watson and other idiots here.

Blood Moon Apocalypse Shall Destroy The Cosmos!

Blood Moon Apocalypse Shall Destroy The Cosmos! published on

Once again the world will be coming to an end as the widely prophesied Blood Moon prepares to destroy the universe! And it all happens this weekend! It might be happening right now, at this very moment!

Due to some sort of astronomical phenomenon ( namely a combination of lunar eclipse, which usually makes the moon look red, and the moon coming closer than usual to the earth) this Sunday night (US time) the moon will appear to be really big and really red. While sensible people will simply go, “Whoa! Cool!” and take lots of selfies with a big red thing in the background, the astronomically stupid are predicting the end of life on earth. According to them, this is all part of a “tetrad,” a fancy word that stupid people use in a futile attempt to sound smart. All it really means is that it’s the fourth lunar eclipse to come at six lunar month intervals and to land on Jewish holidays – September the 28th is the Feast of the Tabernacle. Funnily enough, it’s not the Jews freaking out but the Christians. According to the not-so-wise men, previous tetrads have been the harbingers of disaster. In 1492, the tetrad led to Jews being kicked out of Spain on the pretext that anyone who did not like ham must be up to no good. In 1948 it led to the Arab-Israeli war. And, worst of all, in 1982 it led to the birth of Nicki Minaj.

Most of the hysterics seem to be coming from Evangelical Christians and Mormons who think this all signals the second coming of the messiah, and hence the end of the world — because the messiah is just that kind of guy. Apparently, the Bible itself predicts this terrible event when Saint Peter says something along the lines of “the sun shall be turned to darkness, and the moon shall become like unto blood, a Communist pope shall go to dinner with the Great Satan, and all men shall know that the great and terrible day of the Lord has arrived!” Peter the Rock. Peter the Rock-Headed, more like.

While it is usually the Evangelicals that come out looking as the biggest fools in these situations, this time it looks as if they are being outdone by the Mormons. Panic amongst the latter group has been so widespread that Utah stores are reporting massive increases in the sales of freeze-dried food, torches, blankets, and tin foil hats. In another surprise development, the main driver of the apocalyptic panic this time round is a woman called Julie Rowe, a Mormon who has been going on about the apocalypse for quite a while and who claims all sorts of nutty stuff usually reserved for the comic books. Frankly, I’m surprised she isn’t expecting Galactus to come round and eat everyone! I guess it all goes to show that the distaff side of the Mormon faith has worse things to answer for than Twilight.

Things have gotten so ridiculous that the heads of the Mormon Church have issued a half-assed “stay calm” announcement in which they tell their followers that no apocalypse is imminent but that they should always be prepared for adversity. Way to play both sides of the fence, doofuses. And NASA has jumped in by reassuring people that, no, the earth is not due to be hit by an asteroid this weekend. Stan Lee has also reassured the teeming hordes by pointing out that if Galactus does indeed return this Sunday, the Fantastic Four will be there to stop him, just as they have every other time!

The religious people can hunker down in their well-stocked basements all they want. But not me. No, I prefer to think that when the end comes it will be not at the hands of God’s son Jesus, but rather at the hands of Hank Pym’s son Ultron. That bastard has it in for the entire human race and the way he keeps evolving it’s just a matter of time before the Age of Ultron becomes all too real. And that, my friends, is at least six months away.