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The New Sabrina Totally Sucks

The New Sabrina Totally Sucks published on

So they’ve gone and rebooted another Archie Comics character. This time it’s Sabrina The Teenage Witch or, as we now have to call her, Sabrina The SJW Nutcase.

This latest PC atrocity from the pinheads at Netflix is titled, for reasons not entirely clear from a viewing of the first episode, “The Chilling Adventures Of Sabrina,” and is the vile creation of Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa, a massive asshole who is now really high up on the Archie totem pole. Seems he’s the one responsible for “Riverdale” and that “Archie Meets The Walking Dead” thing. He’s also of Latino descent. And has written for Marvel comics. And now he’s working for Netflix. These days, we all know precisely what to expect from a person with such a background.

In this bland and rather tedious amalgam of teen drama, supernatural lowjinks, and full-on SJW propaganda, Sabrina (played by Kiernan Shipka, a fairly cute midget best known for co-starring in Mad Men) is surrounded by an entire retinue of the kind of post-modernist stereotypes that SJWs frequently use to try to get the sane people to see the world in the same twisted, batshit crazy way that they do.

First, there’s her boyfriend Harvey. Being a straight white male, he is totally clueless when it comes to important cultural matters such as the subtext of Night Of The Living Dead, amongst other things. Surprisingly, he is also a nice, likable kid, though his name suggests that he will soon turn evil – or into a giant rabbit. And speaking of the whole MeToo thing, this incarnation of Sabrina seems to be a fan of that foul movement. In one scene Sabrina, with typical feminist fondness for gender profiling, asks the principal (an uncaring male jerk, of course) to interrogate ALL football players because some of them have been behaving badly. The patriarchal bastard replies that he is not keen on witch hunts, to which Sabrina retorts that she does not approve of that term. A few years ago we could have taken this as merely a reference to some of Sabrina’s ancestors having been hunted for being witches. But given the feminist nature of the show and how the MeToo crowd reacts when some sensible person questions their constant setting of bonfires, it’s safe to say that young Sabrina is going meta and defending the warlock hunters of MeToo from their many detractors. This is, after all, a girl looking to set up a feminist club at the high school!

Which brings us to her two friends other than the nice but uninteresting white boy. The first is a black girl who wears glasses and spouts feminist cant and must therefore be really, really smart. This is a character who once tried to set up some sort of branch of the Black Panthers at the school. In an earlier era this would have had to be taken as a joke, but nowadays it’s probably meant to show everyone how “woke” she is. Hell, she even whines about the “white patriarchy” as if it were a real thing and as if she – a black female – had to worry more about white men than black men. Then there’s “Suzy,” the target of the aforementioned football players’ bad behaviour. Yes, she is a he. A tranny. Or a she-male. Or is it an hermaphrodite? I’m sure there’s some politically correct term for this kind of weirdo but i don’t really know and i don’t really care. What matters is that what we have here is some poor deluded boy who, probably in an attempt to get better marks in school, has decided to pretend he’s a girl. That such people, along with all the other mentally ill folks, should not be mistreated is a given. That their delusions should be indulged is not. It is, in fact, downright evil, yet that’s what the show does. Everyone is constantly referring to him as a her, constantly driving into the audience’s heads the idea that just because someone claims to be something they must, indeed, be that something. It’s the harassment of this “Suzy” guy that leads Sabrina (played by Shipka Tiernan) to create a women’s society at the school. A society that “Suzy” will be a part of. Despite the fact that he isn’t a woman. Yes, folks, it’s that wonderful SJW disregard for science, facts, and reason striking once again, and it’s especially vile to see it in a show aimed at the young and impressionable.

There are quite a few other signs of rampant SJWness to be had. Living with Sabrina (played by Sheepkin Nearman) and her two witchy aunts is some gay, black cousin of hers who is not allowed to leave the plantation, which leads me to suspect that the witches are Democrats. It’s not just their insistence on keeping the black guy in his place, there’s also the fact that they eat human flesh for dinner and worship someone called The Dark Lord, a character no doubt based on George Soros. We also have a racially diverse trio of witches who place a curse on our poor heroine. We don’t know what this curse is, but it probably has something to do with starring in a really lame show. Then there’s the villainess of the piece, a witch or something in service of the Dark Lord who actually uses terms such as “puritanical masculinity” and “misogyny,” and goes on about how women should be running everything. The fact that she is the villainess suggests that she is just an evil entity false flagging the feminist movement because, as we all know, misandry ain’t a real thing.

Strangely enough, Sabrina herself is a rather innocuous creature – if you call murdering an innocent bat being innocuous – who has doubts as to whether or not she should become a servant of the Dark Lord. Unfortunately, the fact that she is a feminist does not augur well and one suspects it won’t be long before she joins her aunts as an unholy, flesh eating servant of Satan. I suspect that poor young Harvey will be first on the menu, and that he will last be seen roasting on a slow spit with an apple in his mouth.

Another aspect of this show that did not please me at all is that it is part of the corrupting of everything that has become so fashionable in popular culture. As a life-long fan of horror movies i clearly have no problem with dark subject matter, but that does not mean that everything has to be turned into some twisted, dark version of its former cute, funny self. Darkness has its place, but so does the light. I no more wish to see a cute cartoony version of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre than i wish to see a version of My Little Pony in which Pinkie Pie goes psycho and kills everyone and sends their bodies to the glue factory! In popular culture we need the cute and funny, and we need the dark and unpleasant, and getting rid of the former will only result in a darker, bleaker world and who the fuck needs that?

So, other than the fact that it is unadulterated SJW swill, is this show worth watching? Not really. For one thing, while darker than it should be for such a character, the thing is not dark enough for horror fans. The closest we get to scary is the scene in which Sabrina first meets her black cat familiar Salem. We briefly see him in his goblin form, but that’s it. (Sabrina, of course, treats this cat-goblin not as a servant but as an equal. Very egalitarian of her, i must say — if only the other black resident of the house could get the same consideration from her blue-tinged aunts!) The other huge problem with the show is that its attempts at humour fall flat on their faces, mostly because of the SJW-ness of the whole thing. The writers seem totally unaware that since SJWs have become a parody of themselves, most people don’t know when they are joking and when they are being serious, and hence won’t know when there is a joke going on! Prime example — the above-mentioned bit about the black nerd girl and the Black Panthers. On the positive side, the cinematography is quite nice, Sabrina (played by Sheepish Gherkin) makes for a likable lead, there’s a cute kitty and…er…did i mention the cute kitty?

I Am Not Tommy Robinson — But I Probably WILL Be!

I Am Not Tommy Robinson — But I Probably WILL Be! published on

Dear Pinheaded Liberals,

Going out on a limb, i am assuming that most of you are not evil, just really, really stupid. I am assuming that most of you dogfaces — unlike your filthy, lying Top Brass — actually care about things like freedom, equality, and so on. I am assuming that, unlike the elites you seem to love so much, you actually give a toss about the poor, the homeless, and all those A-rabs rendered lifeless by neo-con scum like W and O. This, i realize, may be a basket of unwarranted assumptions, but in dark times one has to try to look on the bright side.

So, going on the assumption that most of you are actually well-meaning fools as opposed to ill-meaning psychopaths, imagine this. Ten years from now, a certain liberal figure ( let’s call him Mr. Knucklehead Pastrami ) attends a protest against capitalist evil. Mr. Pastrami does nothing wrong, but somehow ends up arrested and charged with trying to start a riot, or littering, or spitting on the sidewalk, or wearing an unfashionable hat – whatever bullshit excuse they can find for charging him with, in essence, being anti-establishment.

How will you react to this news? You won’t. You won’t because you won’t know that it has happened. You won’t know because the State will have placed a gag order on the media. Sure, a few rebellious corners of the internet will risk arrest by mentioning it, but you, being liberals not Leftists, most likely are not frequenting those tiny, obscure websites. But, hey, who knows? Some of the major “liberal” sites like CNN might get a few stories out before the gag is put in place, right? Sure, they might – but they won’t be keeping them up once the gag is in place. Fearing prosecution and a cell next to poor old Knucklehead’s, they will simply pull those stories down and replace them with the much dreaded “404 – Freedom not found.”

As a result, all that you will know is that Mr. Pastrami has become mysteriously silent, and after a few months, distracted by the “radical, awesome and transformative” political proclamations being Tweeted by Hollywood’s phony Leftists, you will forget that poor old Knucklehead even existed. More importantly, you will soon forget all that liberal claptrap he used to spew…

This, my post-modern liberal friends, is the future that you are building when you fail to speak out against the gag order currently in place against any British reporting on the recent arrest and jailing of Far Right agitator Tommy Robinson. For now, at least, reporting will be allowed after the trial Robinson was reporting on is over, but with any luck – and you can bet this is what the bastards are counting on – by then everyone will have forgotten about Mr. Robinson and the fact that the press were gagged for weeks, even months. And that’s just the state of things as they stand. It is quite possible that we will soon see permanent gag orders placed on the arrest and jailing of political figures. Note that my concern lies mostly with the gag order. Perhaps Robinson’s arrest was justified, perhaps not. What matters here is that the British people are being kept in the dark regarding his arrest and imprisonment. And while for now it is a British problem, you are fools if you think it can’t happen in the U.S. and Europe. Even in countries where the law does not currently allow it, all that’s needed is a few changes in said law. Not hard to do in the U.S, for example, if Fox backs it for “national security reasons” and CNN backs it for the sake of “protecting minorities.”

As expected, pretty much the only people making noise about this atrocious development are the right wingers, proving once again that some sort of IQ exchange has taken place over the last few years and that it is now the right wing of politics that is not quite as dumb as a pile of bricks. Amongst the many things you liberals and pseudo-leftists have forgotten is that there is a thing called precedent. Not the legal kind, but the far more dangerous psychological kind. Once the folks have gotten accustomed to seeing such gags in place, they will be used more and more often to stop the public knowing what is happening to various enemies of the state until it is too late to do anything about it.

The other thing you latte-sipping, kale-munching types are ignoring is that an establishment run by a bunch of lily white Anglicans is highly unlikely to have any genuine concern for a bunch of brown Muslims. Hell, Britain’s establishment figures don’t even care about their fellow white Anglicans, much less about a bunch of Mohammads! But, thanks to your stupidity, they get away with pretending to care so they have your support while they manipulate you into a position somewhere between utter silence and a cold prison cell. Listen up, boys and girls – this is a key point. Make no mistake, this is ultimately NOT about silencing the right wing, it is about silencing ALL dissent, especially liberal or Leftist dissenters that dare to go outside the confines of the establishment’s beloved Identity Politics. Today it is Robinson getting the blackout treatment for opposing Islamic radicalism, tomorrow it will be YOU for daring to complain about the disappearing jobs, or cuts in welfare payments, or lack of low cost housing, or yet another mass slaughter of unsuspecting Tabouli-munchers. Your leaders will remain safe as they are about as truly liberal as a gang of Wall St bankers, and care about the poor even less than you care about the cockroaches living under your fridge. This is about YOU. This is about silencing your voices. This is about consigning your concerns to the dumpster of history. This is about making your future an authoritarian, neo-feudal hell. Hence it is incumbent on you to get off your well-fed asses and speak up about what is being done to Tommy Robinson – because tomorrow, you will be Tommy Robinson.


Here is the gag order – feel free to print it out and wipe your ass with it…

tommy robinson reporting restriction


Stephen Yaksface-Lennon is Robinson’s real name, but you probably already know that.

Who’s the REAL retard?

Who’s the REAL retard? published on

Picture this. A middle class dude in possession of what he foolishly considers to be a good education is walking along minding his own business, when he is approached by a retarded man. The retarded chap proceeds to act like a total fool — jumping up and down, waving his arms wildly, uttering utter gibberish and so on. The middle class dude, in his smug superiority, just stands there laughing at this poor, benighted creature. Meanwhile, the poor, benighted creature’s confederate quietly sneaks his hand into our genius’ pocket, and walks away with his wallet. Now, you tell me – who’s the real retard? The guy feeling all smug and superior, or the guy who a few minutes from now will be in possession of half the contents of our “well-educated” pigeon’s wallet?

As you may have divined by now, the “retarded” man is a tall, rather overweight chap with a striking head of hair and skin bearing a hue usually found on a popular cornmeal-based snack food. Yes, folks, President Cheeto has struck again! Funny how this supposedly very stupid man never does anything stupid enough to cause himself serious damage, isn’t it? He never says, “Damn, i hate them niggers!” or “Fuck deporting the Mexicans and the Muslims, let’s just kill them all!” No. Every time this supposed mountebank puts on his big red nose it seems to be to his advantage, or at least not to any significant disadvantage! How about that? Either he’s saying something that most folks agree with – such as referring to shit-hole countries as shit-hole countries – or saying something that distracts us from what his buddies in congress are getting up to! It is never something fatally “stupid,” something that could end his political life — like deciding that the best way to cross a busy highway is with his eyes closed! I’m no Mr. Ed, but that seems a strange kind of stupidity to me…

Now, am i under the impression that President Cheeto is a genius, stable or otherwise? No, but what i do know is that while his supposedly intelligent critics were busy defending shit-holes and uploading pictures of Mr. Ed to Twitter, President Cheeto’s confederates were busy doing things that said critics would have had a big problem with – had they not been so distracted at the time. Some will argue that while feigned stupidity may be a tactic some times used by politicians, Trump’s stupidity is so often on display that, surely, it must be the genuine article! My answer to that is “No, you bunch of mouth-breathing pinheads!” First, i refer you to the above comment on how Trump never does anything fatally stupid, and secondly i must point out that this may be precisely how Trump wants you to think! If a clearly intelligent man like Obama suddenly starts acting like an idiot, the smarter observers will suspect that something is up. But if someone who has gone out of his way to establish himself as the village idiot acts really dumb, it’s just another day in Idiotville. Going back to the little story at the beginning of this article, the “retard” doesn’t just act retarded when his confederate is present, but also the rest of the time. That way, when his sneaky-handed friend comes around, everyone has their guard down because it’s nothing special, just the village idiot being himself again. Far as this little piggy is concerned, when one takes a cool-headed, objective look at the situation it is clear that while our orange Messiah may not be a “stable genius,” neither is he sitting on a park bench wondering what’s inside that box of chocolates. And speaking of chocolates, his buddies – both Republican and Democrat – just handed him a big box of the things by giving him greater powers to spy on American citizens…

See them chocolates right here, but no touching – they belong to Donnie and his Democratic successors.

A Follow Up To “A Minor Run-in With Some Thugs In Blue”

A Follow Up To “A Minor Run-in With Some Thugs In Blue” published on

A Guest Post By My Manager, Michael Claymore.


So, after yesterday’s unpleasant incident with some Sydney cops, i decided to make a complaint to Coles over their reporting me for…er…stealing my own stuff. According to Coles, the cops seem to have been fully responsible. Seems they were running some grotesque operation wherein they check large backpacks just to, you know, harass folks. Now, while i am inclined to believe the Coles people, the fact that the cops were so convinced i was up to something suggests more than a random check. Perhaps one of the cops, all of whom were in plain clothes, was lurking around the store and was the idiot who made the mistake of thinking my box was not my box. So now, not only does it seem that these cops are jerks who go around trying to escalate situations by calling people dickheads, but at least one them is an idiot who has no idea what he is doing! I wrote yesterday that my view of cops had hit a new low — today it is even lower. Not only are these guys bullying thugs who insult citizens by asking them if they are pedophiles walking around with a hard drive full of kiddy porn, they are also a bit thick.

And what the fuck are they doing searching people just for having large backpacks?!?! Since when does that make anyone a suspect? I am truly shocked and horrified that cops are allowed to do this in what is supposed to be a free country. Searched, accused and harassed just for having a big bag? Not acceptable. As fascinating a train wreck as the US is, i really must start paying a bit more attention to the shit that goes down on my own doorstep.

Screencap of messages from Coles below. Station name has been erased to make it less likely that i will end up in a ditch with a loaded banana in my hand.
coles on cops searching backpack