Latest in the ongoing avalanche of accusations of sexual harassment levied at male feminists is this one in the Huffpo, in which some woman claims that Al Franken grabbed her ass – at a function honoring women in politics!

“The first woman, a 38-year-old book editor who was living in Minneapolis at the time, told HuffPost that she had just finished performing with a feminist choir ( Edit – LOL! ) at the Women’s Political Caucus event, which Franken and his wife, Franni Bryson, attended. After the ceremony, she and other members of the choir approached him for photos…”I saw him and asked if we could take a photo together for my mother, and we stood next to each other … and down his hand went.”

Now, i’m not sure how seriously we should take an accusation of sexist behavior from a woman sexist enough to be in a feminist choir, but if true this does show some very serious chutzpah on Franken’s part! Kinda like showing up at a Katy Perry concert wearing a Taylor Swift t-shirt! But i’m not here to discuss why Taylor Swift is better than Katy Perry, or why the cute, girly Taylor was so much better than the Darkling Bitch Taylor. No, today’s topic is “What The Fuck Is Wrong With Male Feminists?” Why are so many of the guys being outed for sexually harassing — even sexually assaulting — women the kind of grandstanding liberals who habitually make such a big deal out of being “allies” or even straight-out feminists?

Personally, i think the answer to this is pretty simple – it’s all part of a deliberate and conscious strategy by these sexual predators. If you want to cover up your bad behavior with the cottage cheese-brained sex, what better way than to continually go on about how wonderful the little pinheads are? Most people being fairly simple creatures, they are less likely to believe claims of sexual impropriety levied against those who profess themselves champions of women’s rights than similar stories hurled at those of us who openly declare that women are just a couple of steps above chimpanzees in terms of morality and intellectual capacity. Until the Harveywood scandal blew up in everyone’s faces, a lot of liberal dullards would have thought, “Al Franken would never do such a thing, he’s a professed worshipper of women!” But when Bill O’Reilly was accused, nobody batted an eyelid because, you know, not being a screeching male feminist he must hate women. It’s a simple enough tactic, like the latent homosexual who hides his proclivities behind a steady stream of homophobic “jokes,” and until recently the post-modern liberals have been too stupid to catch on – just think of how long Bill Clinton has gotten away with his shit by kissing feminist ass at every turn. But now the jig is up. The darkness inside male feminists has seeped out into the real world, the dragons have been exposed and their White Knight façades lie crumpled on the bathroom floor, just like Harvey Weinstein’s bathrobe, and from now on even the post-modern woman will be wary of being left alone with some guy who won’t stop bleating lest he be just another compulsively wanking wolf like Louis CK or a butt-grabbing, tongue-slipping hypocrite like Franken.

So, what is a woman to do when looking for male company in these dark and dangerous times when even the creator of feminist icon Buffy the Vampire Slayer sits under a cloud, muttering about how it’s all really just the patriarchy’s fault? Well, i say it’s time you ladies sought out the self-declared misogynists, the chauvinists, the sexist Neanderthals – indeed, the Pig Men. After all, experience shows that i might tell you that your head is full of cottage cheese, but at least i won’t pin you down and fuck you against your will – it’s not like i’m a male feminist or anything!