If Sweden is Saudi Arabia for men, Nigeria is Saudi Arabia for gays. Not just gay humans, either, but also gay felines. Some brainless twat of a woman has decided that she no longer wants her cat because he seems to be a bit on the gay side!

According to Leadership, which labels itself Nigeria’s most influential newspaper, this one is for real. A middle aged woman best known in her neighborhood for wearing tin foil hats has apparently divested herself of a male cat who has been her pet for the last seven years because he’s a little pink around the edges. Not only does the cat, who goes by the ironically macho name of “Bull”, make sexual advances only towards other male cats –  who probably wonder what the fuck is going on –  but none of the kittens born in the area seem to have his markings. This has led the cat’s owner, a retired circus pinhead from Lafia, Nasarawa State, to issue this historic, hysterical, and rather unlikely declaration…

“…anybody interested in this gay cat can have it because I have no further use of it.”

She later went on to accuse the cat of not only being a witch, but also of having played a key role in the Kennedy assassination. Could be worse – he could have been a Muslim cat, in which case the woman in question could have had him stoned to death.

I should point out that the cat in the picture is not actually Bull. I don’t even think he’s gay, he probably just pretends to be gay in order to get chicks.

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