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Ted Nugent – Motor City Draft Dodger

Ted Nugent – Motor City Draft Dodger published on

We have all been treated to the pseudo-macho antics of right wing nutter Ted Nugent, he who thinks killing small, furry animals is manly and who would – in what I can only describe as a sign of latent homosexuality – like to have Obama sucking on his great, big, er, “machine gun.” Well, it turns out that old Ted isn’t just a nut, he’s a draft dodger.

Twisted Sister front man Dee Snider recently pointed out how ironic it is that Nugent is such a darling of the right given that he once confessed to High Times that he was so desperate to avoid the draft that 30 days before his physical was due he stopped bathing and brushing his teeth, a habit which he has been struggling to kick ever since. Nugent even went so far as to shit on himself!

Of course, Nugent now claims that he was lying to High Times, but the records show that even though he initially used his studies to avoid the draft, he later dodged the Death Lottery by being classified 4f – i.e. not acceptable due to physical, mental or moral reasons. In other words, the kind of thing one could expect if he turned up with a mouth full of plaque and a pair of jeans full of shit.

The disgusting thing about Nugent is not that he avoided the draft – doing so shows that he wasn’t always a brain-damaged freak – but that he pushes standards that he himself does not live up to. In other words, one standard of behavior for the hoi polloi, another standard for multi-millionaires in the making. Like comic book artist and fellow right wing fruitcake Frank Miller, Nugent is keen to see blood shed for his country – as long as it isn’t his own. Still, there is one upside to this story. At long last we know why Ted likes to kill cute, furry, little critters – unlike the Viet Cong, they don’t shoot back.

More here

The Wages of War…

The Wages of War… published on

… are rarely paid by the rich bastards who start the fucking things. Today, Australia pauses to “honor” those who have been blown to Kingdom Come with dawn ceremonies and trite phrases such as “Age shall not weary them.”

While I don’t doubt that most taking part are sincere in their tributes to the fallen, I also have no doubt that honoring those poor bastards is far from being the primary purpose of Anzac Day. Anzac Day is for the most part a propaganda tool used to convince young fools to fight today’s useless wars by glorifying those who fought yesterday’s useless wars. The truth is that, apart from the second world war and perhaps even the first, few of the wars fought by the men marching today were fought in the defense of this country.

And as bad as things were for those blokes, they are worse for those who fight today’s wars. No jack-booted, genocidal lunatics trying to take over the world this time — except for the ones in the Pentagon. You fall for the propaganda and sign up these days, you won’t be fighting against the modern equivalents of Hitler, you will be fighting for them. It is almost a given that any war you get sent into will be fought solely or primarily for the benefit of multinational corporations and/or the creation of a New American Century. It won’t be about protecting Australia, or even England, it will be about laying down your life for a bunch of psychopaths who won’t lose a minute of sleep slaughtering hundreds of thousands in order to fatten their wallets. But I guess there are worse things than dying for nothing, you could end up looking like these poor bastards– for nothing.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Katy Perry – Military Pop-agandist?

Katy Perry – Military Pop-agandist? published on

I’m not fond of this dog-faced wonder, mostly due to “Ur So Gay,” a vile little number telling some emo boy to kill himself because, in essence, he isn’t masculine enough. Even coming from someone else such an attitude would be contemptible, but coming from a girl who sings about kissing girls and liking it, it is doubly so. Apparently in Ms Perry’s worldview straight but un-masculine boys should be reviled, while straight girls into a bit of Sapphic fun should be celebrated as strong, independent and of course sexy.

But this isn’t about Perry’s hypocritical view of gender, or the fact that her face looks like a moose’s rear end, it is about her new video, which seems to be trying very hard to portray dying for the oligarchy as some sort of triumph of Girl Power. Apparently, as young American males are wising up and realizing that being able to feel more manly because they joined the army and killed some A-rabs doesn’t really compensate for having their balls blown off, the oligarchy is now turning to the female sex for its cannon fodder.

Poor Video-Katy, she gets cheated on by her bloke, and for some bizarre reason decides that the way to get revenge is to become a mercenary! I’m sorry, I meant to write “a marine,” but there really isn’t much difference these days, is there? So she gives herself a haircut (bad idea, honey — it’s your only attractive feature) and joins the army, where she proceeds to act all butch and shit. Not only do we see the young fool go through basic training, but she seems to end up in some desert war, no doubt proving that you don’t need to be male to be tough.

Now, what the fuck does any of this have to do with a song about being cheated on? Nothing, that’s what. Going to war isn’t even a good metaphor for getting over a broken heart, so why the military theme? Call me cynical, but I think the main thing going on here is that some bastard somewhere decided it was time for women to start doing their fair share of the dying, and that if you can use machismo to sell the army to stupid boys you can sure as hell use Girl Power to sell it to idiot girls.

This entire thing reminds me of an old episode of The Simpsons. You know the one. The one in which Bart’s boy band is being used to sell the army to children, subliminal messages and all. It was funny then, it doesn’t seem so funny now…

Laying It On The Line For The Oligarchy

Laying It On The Line For The Oligarchy published on

We all know that exercising that rather dubious “male privilege” of going to war has its many risks — becoming dead, becoming legless in the not-so-much-fun definition of the word, trying to wipe your ass without any hands, having the kind of face that makes women faint and small children run away screaming, etc. Another unfortunate effect of all this privilege, at least now that medicine can keep you alive even after you’ve been blown up, is literally having your genitals blown off so that the aptly named Dick Cheney and his mates can get their hands on someone else’s oil.

Since 2005 more than 1500 American pieces of cannon fodder have been carried out of the slaughterhouse with some sort of genital trauma, and since the bastard in the White House launched a surge in 2009, the number of such injuries has virtually doubled to about 300 a year. Does Obama care? Probably not — we know he doesn’t care about the poor, we know he doesn’t care about men, and these poor bastards are both so I don’t think he’s losing much sleep.

Personally I found this quote from the linked article rather sad, speaking as it does to a rather skewed set of priorities…

“I remember lying on my side, dust everywhere, and I looked down and saw my arms were split open and squirting blood and I had just two bloody stumps above my knees,” said Marine 1st Lt. James Byler, 26, …”My first coherent words to my Marines were, ‘Hey! check my nuts!'”

Call me crazy, but if my legs had just been blown off and my arms broken apart, my first set of words would be “Oh shit, I’ll never run or walk or do the Lambada ever again!” My second would be “Oh fuck, I hope I don’t lose my arms!” Some time after that I would idly mutter “Mmm, wonder if my nuts are still there?” And frankly, if I had to choose between losing my penis or my arms or legs, it would definitely be the less glimpsed of those five appendages getting a memorial plaque. That said, the Pigman won’t be putting his porker in a food processor any time soon.

More in this surprisingly sensitive article in the HuffPost