Are you a Scotsman? Have you been saying unpleasant things on the internet? Have you said unkind things like, “Och, aye, Taylor Swift has shit for brains”? Have you been telling tourists untrue things like “The haggis is a small, wild herbivore that lives exclusively on kumquats and strawberry wine”? Have you been saying unnecessary things like, “Grass is generally speaking of a greenish hue”? If so, then you are fucked up, dudes! The Glasgow filth is coming for you! Grab your claymores and blarney stones, your women and children, and run for those green, green hills!

EDIT : Heh, someone just pointed out on Parler that this thing is dated April 1st. Yes, looks like i got fooled. But, man, it looks so authentic! And it’s too much fun to throw away so i will leave it here. But don’t go spreading it, ’cause it’s probably bull.