So, to make life more bearable during Sydney’s never-ending lockdown, piggy has been hanging around free porn streaming sites to see what’s going on. So far i have learnt quite a few interesting things, which i will now proceed to share in no particular order and for no particular reason.

– Today’s young men have a shocking lack of respect for nuns.

– There is now something called clown porn. Yes folks, i bumped into a video of some hot young thing having a gangbang with a bunch of clowns — literal clowns, with red noses, green wigs, oversized…er…shoes, the whole thing. I guess when you live in Clown World, it’s just a matter of time before they get you.

– There are an unusual number of women getting stuck in windows out there. In windows, under beds, in various tricky bits of furniture, and even inside tumble dryers!

– There are not enough women having sex with cucumbers.

– Even though it may appear to be otherwise, nobody is having sex with the British Broadcasting Corporation.

– America’s stepmothers are a surprisingly generous lot.

– The acronym ATM has nothing at all to do with getting cash out of a machine in the wall. (Don’t Google it. Really, don’t.)

– Piper Perri is hollow.