You may recently have been witness to the rather cute footage of a banker helping some ducklings down from a ledge.

Now, as often happens, what the public sees is very different to what the feminists see. Everyone else thought it was great of banker Joel Armstrong to help mama duck with her babies but Ms Ivanna Jihad, head of the Washington chapter of NOW, sees it differently.When my correspondent in the US approached her for comment this was her reaction…

“Oh yes, it looks nice but then a lot of patriarchal oppression does. This man’s true aim wasn’t to help the ducklings but rather to oppress their mother! What this is really about is a secret middle class agenda to demean all single mothers. “Oh, shes a single mom, obviously she can’t do the job without a man’s help!” And how do you think the mother duck feels now you insensitive bastard? She feels inadequate that’s how! She feels like she has failed as a mother and all because this man stuck his nose where it doesn’t belong. You’re fucking lucky this banker man didn’t live with this duck or we’d have him charged with domestic abuse!”

The last my correspondent saw of Ms Jihad she was running through the streets, ranting and raving, arms waving wildly in the air.

The unforgivable act of oppression is depicted below.