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Posts authored by The Pigman

Is Donald Duck a Sexual Harasser ?

Is Donald Duck a Sexual Harasser ? published on

Is no one safe from the hysteria surrounding sexual harassment? What has the world come to when an innocent duck can’t go about his day’s work without being accused of groping some hysterical cow?

Yes folks, in the most surprising allegations of sexual harassment since Homer Simpson was almost lynched by that young feminist and her friends, Disney icon Donald Duck (that’s him in the photo, looking down the poor bitch’s cleavage) stands accused of groping a human female, something which in this case strikes me as akin to bestiality.

It is alleged that the foul fowl grabbed the breast of one April Magolon, who claims to be so devastated by the tragic event that she now suffers from post-traumatic stress disorder! As a result, Magolon supposedly has to endure nightmares in which she is goosed by a duck, and has developed an inability to take her dog for a walk in any park which has a duck pond!

One would think that given the slight nature of the alleged slight and the capacious size of  Disney’s coffers the suit would be dismissed as mere money grubbing. But instead it’s going to court, where I not only hope that Donald and his employers win but that they get their court costs paid by the accuser. PTSD from being groped by a duck? Not bloody likely!

As you have probably divined by now, I find the allegations difficult to accept. After all, what possible sexual interest could a duck have in a human female? If Mr Duck had been accused of surreptitiously fondling Daisy or making homoerotic advances towards Daffy  (it would certainly explain that sailor suit)  I might give this some credence – as it is I think this will soon be thrown into the same BS basket as the case of  Anita Hill vs Elmer Fudd.

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Another Black Male Headed For the Big House

Another Black Male Headed For the Big House published on

 

Michigan man Leon Walker, the  third husband of Clara Walker, was concerned that Clara was stepping out on him with her abusive second husband, so he got into her email account in order to confirm his suspicions….

Upon learning that he was indeed being deceived, he turned the evidence of the affair over to the wife’s first husband, i.e the father of  Clara’s young son, a child who had on at least one occasion been treated to the sight of his step daddy beating the crap out of mommy. As a result of the affair, the boy is now in the custody of his father – that’s the first husband, the non-abusive one. Confusing I know but don’t blame me, Clara’s the one who gets around.

So now the Oakland County Prosecutor, a cowpat of a woman called Jessica R. Cooper, wants to lock Leon Walker up for five years on a charge of “felony computer misuse”! Now, does Cooper truly believe that this man is a threat to society, or does this have something to do with the contents of his pants? Would she have charged a woman in this situation? I think not, and I’ll tell you why – because in Michigan adultery is still illegal, yet Cooper has not charged the wife with said crime!

If I ever run into Jessica Cooper, I plan to make some felony misuse of a baseball bat, but as it is I will just send her a nasty email at info@oaklandprosecutor.org

More here.

Dumbass Woman Can’t Tell East from West

Dumbass Woman Can’t Tell East from West published on

Because the American political scene wasn’t already enough of a joke, Sarah Palin has recently been given her own reality tv show, a move which has put her prowess as an outdoorsy type under the microscope, and which has given the world yet another glimpse into what is no doubt the finest conservative intellect of her generation.

In a recent episode of her show, Palin and her old dad went a-huntin’ and, much as she did during a recent radio interview, the poor addled woman forgot to bring her compass with her.

One morning, Palin and her old man were setting out for a day of happy go lucky critter killin’ (mostly cos there weren’t no Injuns around)  when the perpetually bewildered female pointed to the horizon and suggested that the two should go west. Her poor old dad, perhaps wondering why his twilight years should be blighted by the presence of such an idiot child, paused awkwardly before noting that the woman who would be president was in fact pointing to the east!

Apparently she’s not much of a hunter either as she takes five shots to hit a stationary caribou, gets her dad to load the gun for her, and has occasionally been heard referring to her rifle as “the Boom thingy!”

It’s a good thing Sarah Palin wasn’t alive when the United States catch cry was “Go west”  – she would probably have ended up settling somewhere in Brooklyn.

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