The internet is celebrating today after having found its latest feminist role model, some knuckleheaded, moose-humping lesbian who decided to turn her high school yearbook into a lame piece of propaganda with this ludicrous claim…

“I need feminism because I intend on marrying rich and I can’t do that if my wife and I are making .75 cent for every dollar a man makes.”

… blithered microcephalic sapphist Caitlyn Cannon to the delight of other pinheads on Twitter, a site which is now seen as some sort of legitimate news source. Sooner or later the NYTimes will do an article on the lizard people claiming as its source the pea-brained denizens of Twitter, it’s just a matter of time now.

But back to the matter at hand. Take a close look at that quote. Not only does the young fool parrot the long-discredited idea that the wiminz get paid less than the men but she does it in a way suggesting she went to a US school rather than a Canadian one. Now, I am no mathematician but I am pretty sure that the dot just before the 75 means something along the lines of “three quarters of a cent”! I mean, unlike Caitlyn I haven’t just left high school, but that’s how I remember it. Maybe math has been changed to suit feminist tastes since the eighties — god knows everything else has.

And check out the fawning at the CBC article. “Powerful”? Since when does the word denote a prosaic idea, unimaginatively expressed? Since feminism, of course. Any feminist statement, no matter how hackneyed or untrue, is “powerful” because it gets out the “right” message and makes the troglodytes who dominate the movement feel good about themselves.

As for the statement’s primary claim, assuming the semi-literate woman-child really meant 75 cents per dollar, it all boils down to women not doing equal work. Want equal pay? Work the same hours as the men, in the same dirty, physically hard, physically dangerous jobs as the men do. Problem solved.

Feminist math here.